Wednesday, December 28, 2005

I downloaded a new browser, Opera 8.5. I don't like it so far, but it uses less ram than Firefox. Doesn't seem to be completely operable with Java Applets for some reason.

I was talking the other day with a friend about music, and the subject of how your mood corresponds to your music, ie, when you have a bad music day or are playing poorly, you feel bad. At first I said this is certainly true, and I said the theory that you should be happy no matter how you're playing that day was bogus. Well I got to thinking about it and I wondered, if I get bent out of shape because a scale I've worked on seemingly all day doesn't work, then how does the guy who had his left hand amputated? If that guy can get depressed about his state, then how does the guy feel that's completely paralyzed? What right do I ever have, to be depressed about anything externally wrong? Keep in mind I am NOT saying I don't get upset about things, but I do wonder what right I have to do that. What are my motives for being upset, and where has my perspective gone? If I can't be happy trusting God, and doing my best, then I've got a problem. On the flip side, I'll admit that yes, when I do get upset it's because my perspective is messed up and I'm not trusting God as fully as I ought. I can't say that there isn't a time to mourn, because the Bible says there IS a time to mourn. I'm only saying that the things that I let bother me are often so insignificant. Say some guy was on the face of a mountain for hours, waiting to be rescued, praying for someone to come along, and thinking the end was in sight. He was getting tired of holding himself from falling off, and as he was about to drop himself and perish, his buddies finally find him and rescue him. Hooray! He's alive, he's whole, and he's going home. On the way to his home, they stop at a gas station where his buddy's sister happens to work, and they all go in to get something to drink. The guy who has been rescued, when he finds out he was given the wrong change starts yelling at the clerk, telling her how how annoying it is to be given the wrong change and how inconvenienced he was. How ridiculous this guy is (and I know this is a weak analogy, as his brain was probably messed from waiting for hours thinking he was going to end up dying, but I've got about 30 seconds left before I have to leave), and how ridiculous we are, as Christians, when we forget that we ourselves have been rescued from an eternity in hell and complain about what amounts to nothing, really. As I type this, my brother is whistling loudly right by my bad ear...what an annoying kid. Whoops...I'm not upset. See the grin on my face :D

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